What Does It Mean?

As I sit in a space God and I created together, I still wonder what it means.

It was this time last year that I was home alone, and God's presence rested on me in a way that I had never experienced, and He began to speak. There are two things that He said that still live freely in my mind and heart.

1. I need you to grieve the life you thought you would have.

2. I need you to carry something for me.

I can look back at that moment a year ago and acknowledge that He, in His limitless love for me, was preparing my heart for a year full of loss, grief, and change. He was right, and in some ways, I still grieve, but not without hope.

The seed that He planted in my heart as I surrendered what I expected, what I thought, and what I wanted was hope. At every turn, at every decision other people made, at every decision I had to make that broke my heart, it was not without hope.

My prayer for you is that you willingly give God your hand (and heart) and allow Him to walk you through each hard thing, each hard decision, each hard season. There are very few things I consider bad now. They just are.

He is not afraid of your frustration, anger, disappointment, confusion, or doubt. Choosing to be fully present in those moments and being honest creates space for healing, restoration, and hope. If we do not have what we need, it may be because our hands and hearts are not open to receive.

There is still a lot I do not understand, but there are a couple of things I am sure of. He loves me. I hear Him. He is faithful. He prepares us for the unknown. Hope is real. Joy and sadness can coexist. Grief does not have to be the end. Beauty for ashes is a promise.

#hope #heart #youarenotalone #Godisreal #Godisgood