The Road to Santiago

"Because of my pride in wisdom, you made me walk the Road that every person can walk and discover what everyone else knows if they have paid the slightest attention to life. You made me see that the search for happiness is a personal search and not a model we can pass on to others. Before finding my sword, I had to discover the secret - and the secret was so simple; it was to know what to do with it."

-The Pilgrimage

"We must never stop dreaming. Dreams provide nourishment for the soul, just as a meal does for the body. Many times in our lives we see our dreams shattered and our desires frustrated, but we have to continue dreaming. If we don't, our soul dies, and agape (love) cannot reach it."

-The Pilgrimage

Maybe I have been under a rock, but I had heard of the book The Alchemist, but I had not heard of The Pilgrimage. What started as a sweet Christmas gift from my daughter, turned into a 2 day book binge where I had to resist the urge to highlight and take notes so I could stay present in the book.

My 13 year old daughter calls me a nerd regularly, but it's wrapped in humor and a respect for my love for learning. She asked me one question, what type of books do you like? Although the book she bought for me did not fall into the categories I mentioned , she told me after she read the summary, she knew it was perfect for me.

I enjoy informative books that provide knowledge, but there is nothing like a well written story that the reader can relate to. It's always a pleasant surprise when you connect with a story, and then you discover it is based on a true story. The story is about a man on a spiritual journey, traveling by foot on the Road to Santiago in Spain. He is in search of his sword, something he failed to receive months before because of his perceived failure. He has to pass tests as his guide teaches him lessons about slowing down, being fully present, and self awareness. There was emphasis placed on the need for him to know how he would use his sword before he would find it, and it made me think of the parallel in my own life.

Although I had a successful career where I was receiving promotions, a loving husband, healthy children, and amazing friends, I always felt like something was missing. I went through a vicious cycle where I wondered what I was doing with my life. I was sowing, serving, and volunteering, but I still lacked a sense of purpose. I had a strong desire to know my purpose, why was I placed on this earth? When I went from wondering to seeking, there were several situations that happened that made me think that I "found it." Those situations always ended in disappointment.

This search did not lead me to a specific place or thing, but it definitely exposed my areas of weakness, insecurity, and it exposed my tendency to play it safe. I also learned that the thing that was driving me to know was selfish ambition. I had not thought beyond myself, which meant once I "found it," it would have led to another journey of discovery without much use. I would have been able to say I knew, but the likelihood of me using it, and especially for others, would be slim. It would have been discarded in my bucket of knowledge, accomplishments, trophies, and accolades - devalued and wasted.

It was work and it was through traveling my own Road to Santiago that I would learn that it was less about knowing my purpose, and more about the people I would serve once I knew. It was less about where I was trying to arrive, and more about being present on the road and the lessons I would learn. Just like the story's character, the fog lifted and the path became more clear when my desire to use what I found became more important than finding it.

It was like reading about myself because his journey mirrored mine; selfish ambition, self-awareness and growth, experiencing unconditional love (from God), which moved him along his journey. Some parts of the walk he had a guide, but the biggest transitions and victories happened alone. When he finally found his sword, just like his guide said, his biggest challenge and accomplishment would be leading someone else on the road. I cannot tell you if he physically took anyone, but writing the story and continuing to be an author is how Paulo Coelho used his experience, his journey, his story, to impact the masses.

If your why does not expand past yourself and your immediate family, you are thinking too small. Why do you want to know your purpose? Why do you want to open the business or become wealthy? What is the motive behind that big dream? If you want the sword just to say you found it, you are limiting yourself and the tool's use will not be maximized. Before you start the new thing, open the business, or jump into the deep, assess your why. The only thing that will sustain you when things get difficult and you hear no more than you expected, is a why that is bigger than yourself.

The Pilgrimage reminded me of why I started Mom Dreams and why I wrote the book because it is easy to get lost and lose sight of purpose in the midst of doing. The doing is not just what I do in Mom Dreams, the doing is everyday life. There were multiple roads mentioned in the book, and although I was victorious in finding my sword on The Road to Santiago, I am now learning what it means to guide people to their own sword. It is difficult, it can be tiring, but it is worth it. There is not one accomplishment that will truly make you feel like you have arrived. There will always be a new road to travel, and a new lesson to learn. You will experience true fulfillment when you have learned to share your experience with others, the ones that understand your voice, so that they can find their way.

You do not need my recognition, but well done Paulo Coelho.

"The good fight is the one that's fought in the name of our dreams. When we're young and our dreams first explode inside us with all of their force, we are very courageous, but we haven't yet learned how to fight. With great effort, we learn how to fight, but by then we no longer have the courage to go into combat. So we turn against ourselves and do battle within. We become our own worst enemy. We say that our dreams were childish, or too difficult to realize, or the result of our not having known enough about life. We kill our dreams because we are afraid to fight the good fight."

-The Pilgrimage